Living For Yesterday
by It's me get over it
Summary: Tragedy hits the Enterprise crew and while everyone is stunned, for two people it destroys their very foundations and they don't know how to recover. An AU one-shot. -Not crazy about this summary, writing inside is better, I promise!-


_Okay, I was going through my computer and found this. I wrote this AGES ago and put it up on a forum that's now shut down. But I'm actually quite proud of this one and I wanted to share it again. It's a bit sad and dark, but that's where the muse took it. Please let me know what you think._

* * *

The only sound that could be heard in the corridor was the echoing of their footsteps. As the door at the end slowly came into sight so did the realization of what was behind it. And the future didn't appear to be getting any brighter.

His eyes bore the mark of sleepless nights awake crying. Crying tears that seem to never stop. After the first day he thought it would get better. Thought the pain would lessen, instead it intensified. But things didn't turn out the way he expected. Not anymore.

It seemed hard to believe that it was still possible to feel anything. Despondency and numbness were the only things he was capable of. A cloud of despair had descended upon him and there was nothing he could do eradicate it. He couldn't even offer the child next to him any comfort. He felt at ends. A part of him had been ripped so viciously from him. Leaving an open wound that nothing could fill and refused to heal. How can you offer comfort when all you do is cry?

Smiles once capable of lighting an entire room were now rare. When a smile did occur it was forced and for the sake of those around, not an expression of what was felt inside. A once charming face was now blank and impassive. This child still considered a boy, was faced with such bleakness that no one should have to face at such a young age. He wore the look of deep suffering that should never be expressed by a child. In a matter of a few short days he was forced to mature far beyond his years, and became the rock for so many of the adults around him. He was force to watch as the world around him was destroyed and lay in pieces at his feet. A world that was once warm, loving and an exciting adventure waiting to happen was now dark, cold and a horribly cruel place.

They were stopped just before the door by a crewmember. Words of sympathy were giving but not absorbed. He could only nod. Not trusting his own voice. The child spoke words of thanks on their behalf.

He looked down at him. He was his pillar of strength. His support through this hard time. Again he could feel the tears welling up in his eyes. An all too familiar lump grew at the back of his throat. A hot feeling rose from his stomach, through his chest and settled next to the lump. But he wasn't going to start crying now. Not here. He just couldn't. He wouldn't have the strength to pull himself back together.

Together, hand-in-hand, they went through the door. All talking ceased when they entered the room. Eyes filled with sadness and pity followed their every movement. He felt like a black hole of depression. Everywhere he went the surrounding emotions were sucked in and all that was left in its place was anguish.

A small squeeze on his hand brought him out of his dark thoughts. He looked down at him. He wasn't leaning on him for support; he was letting him know he's there with him. Again he was surprised by how much this boy was like a man. Accepting what life had given him with grace that people five times his age couldn't muster.

Only at one point did he leave his side that entire day. And when he did it wasn't for himself, if was for someone with a greater need.

At the burial he left his side to be next to a man who stood at the foot of the graves. Gently he put his hand in the bearded man's causing him to look down at him.

Softly he said, "It's okay to cry. I miss them too. But it's not goodbye. We'll see them again one day. At least they will always be together now. Watching over us all."

His words weren't spoken loudly, but everyone there could hear him. Everyone saw a strong man break down at his words. This man, stricken by unnecessary guilt, had gone beyond his point of endurance. All were witnesses to his breakdown. Watched as he fell to his knees and cried. Cried gut-wrenching, heart-breaking sobs that racked through his body. Cried into the waiting arms of a boy who had lost so much more, and was that much stronger for it.

-/\\- -/\\- -/\\-

The crew of the _Enterprise_ felt orphaned. They'd lost the man they loved as a father, and the woman who protected them as a mother. The ship herself seemed to be mourning their loss. Corridors seemed subdued even during 'day-time' hours.

Off in the quarters that once were that of the Captain and his family, a man and a boy packed away the belongings of their parents. The elder looked down at his new charge.

The boy had inherited most of his looks from their mother, most notably was the red hair. But his eyes, oh his eyes, and his spirit were that of his father. ' _The heart of an explorer, and soul of a poet,_ ' was one description of his father, but the boy was also armed with his mother's analytical mind. He was the perfect tribute to both of them

Wesley made a promise that day, as they put so many memories away. He would do what his mother and step-father now couldn't. He would raise their son well. Help him to become a man to be proud of. No more wallowing in grief and pity. It was time to walk tall again. Stop living for yesterday and live for tomorrow again.

* * *

 _Let me know what you think. Did you guess the POV character before the last bit? I'm always happy to receive a review._


End file.
